So, you have finally decided that it is time to propose to your partner. Now, you may wonder when buying the perfect engagement ring is best. There are several things to consider before you actually go out and buy the ring. First, when do you plan on proposing? The proposal date will significantly affect when you purchase the ring.

Even if you haven’t decided when to propose, the ring is probably high on your priorities. You likely are trying to figure out what type of ring your partner wants and how much you can afford. Of course, there are certain times of the year when you can save money on engagement rings, so chances are this is something you are also wondering about.

Today we will talk about the best time to buy an engagement ring. Let’s get started.

The Best Time to Buy an Engagement Ring                                  

When you come down to it, the best time to buy an engagement ring is when you are absolutely ready. The right time is totally up to you, for the most part. Of course, it can be a bit more complicated than just knowing the right time if you are trying to get the most for your money.

There is no right or wrong time to shop for an engagement ring. However, there are a few things to consider. For example, did you know many jewelers tend to reduce prices around the holidays?

While it is often thought that getting engaged during the holidays is bad luck, there is nothing wrong with buying a ring during the holidays; just because you have the ring doesn’t necessarily mean you have to propose right away.

No Prime Shopping Season

If you plan on buying engagement, know there is no prime shopping season for jewelry. Sure, there may be some good deals around the holidays, so this would be an excellent time to shop if you are on a strict budget. But you might be surprised to find there can be better deals before and after the holiday season.

For instance, the Black Friday and Cyber Monday sales can offer some pretty great deals, but chances are you will not find any jeweler that will substantially reduce their products.

Beware of “Great” Online Deals

There may be perks, such as free shipping when you order online, but we don’t recommend ordering an engagement ring online. Many people have been fooled into thinking they are buying quality jewelry, only to find out that their white gold rings are simply base metals or sterling silver plated with white gold.

But this isn’t to say that there aren’t reputable jewelers that sell their products online. It is a good idea to shop around and visit a few stores. Once you find what you are looking for, you can see if it, or something similar, is available through an online jewelry seller.

Some discounts you may find online, besides free shipping, could be free gifts with your purchase (such as a matching pendant or earrings) and possibly deals on the setting.

Stores are Busy During the Holidays

Another thing that may deter you from purchasing an engagement ring during the holiday season is that the stores are incredibly busy at this time of year. There isn’t as much selection as others have already swooped in to buy rings and other jewelry. For this reason, many people shop before or after the holidays so they don’t have to fight through crowded malls and stores.

When Do You Plan to Propose?

Another thing to consider when planning to buy an engagement ring is when you will make the proposal. In fact, many experts recommend planning your purchase around the actual proposal date if you have one in mind. For instance, if you plan on proposing on Valentine’s Day, the best time to shop for a ring could be in January (you may also find post-holiday sales during this time).

One study shows that while some people shop for engagement rings about three to four months before proposing, others may begin as much as a year in advance. Others said they began shopping about six months before they were planning on proposing.

Consider the Ring Itself

Are you thinking about having a ring custom-designed for your partner? Is there a particular style you think they would like more than other styles? If you have definite ideas about what you are looking for, it may be a good idea to start shopping several months before the planned proposal.

This is especially true if you have a custom-made ring. There are many different production timelines, and the more intricate the design, the longer it will likely take. While it may only take three or four weeks to receive a ring you ordered from a jeweler, you can expect that timeline to increase dramatically if it is custom-made.

Let’s say you are looking for a fancy-cut diamond center stone with a large carat weight. This will take much longer to source than an already pre-designed ring. There is a lot involved in the creation of a custom-designed engagement ring. It all begins with a consultation.

You will need to select the central stone, as well as other stones, if the ring is to include more than one diamond. Then, you should sit with the jeweler and decide how the setting will look.

This will take time, so consider this if you are serious about giving your partner a one-of-a-kind engagement ring.

Conclusion

An engagement ring is likely one of the most important purchases you will ever make. You need to take your time to ensure you get precisely what you are looking for and that your partner will cherish it forever. There is no ideal time to shop for engagement rings.

Many factors are involved in this purchase, and you need to decide when the time is right for you.

An engagement ring is one of the most important pieces of jewelry you will ever own. Not only is it a profoundly emotional expression, but it is also something you will wear every day of your life. The perfect engagement ring symbolizes your unique relationship and reflects your style.

When an expression is so important, it’s no wonder that many people choose to design their engagement ring instead of selecting an existing one. If you want a uniquely significant ring, here is everything you need to know to on how to design your own diamond ring.

Online Design Tools

Most jewelers, especially large companies with a substantial online presence, allow you to design your ring online, customizing your engagement ring to your preferences. When using these types of online engagement ring design tools, here are some things to keep in mind:

Product Line

The options available to you within these online design tools are limited to the product range of that company. In other words, if you want a band made of palladium but they don’t carry palladium, you cannot choose it during the customization process.

Range of Customization Options

Most tools are designed to help you match your preferred stone with your preferred setting within the stones and settings offered by the company. Some of these tools will also allow you to choose a different band material or add accent stones, but the range of options is limited.

Conditional Designs

In most cases, specific settings are designed for particular ring shapes, and vice versa. As a result, you aren’t able to match settings and stones in unusual ways. 

In other words, most online engagement ring design tools offered by major retailers do not allow you to design your own ring. However, they will enable you to customize an engagement ring within their product offerings. They work best when the retailer offers a ring you like but you want to customize it in a few specific ways.

Before using the online ring design tool, review the existing engagement ring inventory offered by the jeweler to see what metals, settings, and stone options are available to you. 

Start From Scratch

If you want a custom engagement ring and don’t want to mix and match, you can start from scratch and design a truly unique ring.

In most cases, this service is offered by boutique jewelers rather than large retailers, and it can be more expensive and time-consuming than customizing a pre-existing ring design. Here is an overview of the process of designing your own engagement ring.

Find Inspiration

Start by determining what you want in your ring design. Consider different stones and settings and what you like about them. Next, collect reference images of existing rings you like and are inspired by. Make sketches.

Set Your Budget

Your budget is essential in your ring design, so it’s important to be clear about how much you can spend and your financial priorities.

You may be willing to choose more affordable metals or stones to achieve the right size and style, or vice versa. Of course, your jeweler will work within your budget, but it’s an important consideration.

Choose a Jeweler

Every jeweler has their own skills and specialties and will use their own process in designing your custom engagement ring. This step is so important that we’ve written a whole section below.

Initial Designs

After a consultation with you, your jeweler will use your reference and inspiration, requirements, and budget to create initial designs, often sketches.

Many jewelers will also create a 3D version of the design, so you can look at it from all angles and make sure your custom ring is perfect before production begins.

Wax Model

Traditionally, diamond engagement rings are made using the “lost wax” process. This means that the jeweler will carve the final ring design into a wax model, creating a perfect replica of the ring in wax.

Cast and Set

After a diamond engagement ring is carved in wax, the wax model is cast into a plaster mold. The plaster perfectly captures all the detail of the wax ring.

Once the plaster is set, the mold is heated, so the wax melts, leaving a void (this is why the process is called “lost wax”). Your chosen metal is then poured into the now-empty mold, perfectly replicating the design of the wax ring.

Finishing Touches

Once the metal ring is removed from the mold, it needs a great deal of refining and polishing before the stone is added and the ring is complete.

What to Look for in a Custom Ring Jeweler

A custom engagement ring is a significant investment, and choosing the right jeweler is crucial. When looking for a custom diamond ring designer, here are the most important factors to keep in mind:

Look at the Jeweler’s Gallery or Portfolio

It’s essential to choose a jeweler with an existing style that meshes with yours, even when creating something new. Examine the jeweler’s engagement ring portfolio, especially their custom rings, to ensure you like their work and style.

Check Ratings and Reviews

You may think that a specific custom ring is gorgeous, but if it wasn’t what the customer wanted, that’s essential information. You can often find ratings and reviews on websites like Yelp or by searching for terms like “[jeweler name] reviews.”

Search “Best Of” Lists

You can often find great jewelers by searching for the best jeweler in your city, the best website for custom engagement rings, the best engagement ring designer, the best ring boutique on Etsy, etc.

If you find a jewelry designer whose work you love, they may be willing to create a custom ring for you, even if that isn’t an advertised service.

Request Recommendations

It’s always a great idea to reach out to friends and family and ask for recommendations. But, again, personal experience is a great way to know that you are choosing the right jewelry designer for your needs. 

Custom Engagement Ring Cost

The cost of your engagement ring depends on the stones’ size, the metals’ cost, and the design complexity.

Custom diamond rings can range in price from a few hundred to tens of thousands of dollars. Here are a few things to consider when determining the cost of your custom engagement ring.

More Affordable Than You Think

In many cases, working directly with a jeweler to design and make a unique diamond ring is more affordable than you think.

While the cost of one-on-one, handcrafted, unique designs drives prices up, the lack of middlemen and retail markups brings costs down. So in many cases, a custom ring can cost less than you imagine.

Provide the Stone(s) Yourself

A great way to save money on any engagement ring is to provide the loose stone yourself rather than purchasing it with the ring. This allows you to update gemstones that may have been passed down in the family or choose the perfect loose stone that fits your budget.

Invest in Quality

Engagement rings see a lot of wear and tear over your lifetime. Choosing a great jeweler, designing for durability, and using quality materials can save you thousands in repair costs over time.

Your jewelry designer will discuss the budget with you during the design process and can help you determine where to save and where to spend on a custom engagement ring.

Weighing different factors will help you come up with a custom ring you can afford and love.

Related Questions

Why choose a custom-designed engagement ring?

There are three main reasons to choose a custom-designed engagement ring:

• First, you have a particular requirement that isn’t met by retail rings. For example, if you must have a tungsten band or require an unusual centerpiece stone.
• You want a completely unique wedding ring. Perhaps you like the idea that no one else in the world will have a wedding ring precisely like yours, or you want your ring to tell a unique story.
• You have existing jewelry to incorporate into your wedding band. Perhaps you want to use your mother’s diamond or include a family heirloom in your wedding band.

How long does it take to create your own engagement ring?

The exact time to create a custom engagement ring depends on your design and your jeweler. In most cases, it takes several days or a couple weeks to create a custom ring from scratch, with most of the time invested in the design phase. However, if your jeweler is extremely busy, it may take them longer to complete custom orders.

How many carats should an engagement ring be?

There is no rule for how large a ring should be: it should be a ring you love at a price you can afford. The average size of an engagement ring diamond is 1.5 carats.

Still, studies show that carat weight is not the most essential factor; the shape and cut of a diamond influence how large it looks, and the cut and setting determine how the ring looks on the hand that wears it. For example, a .8-carat diamond, cut and set properly, and scaled correctly to the finger, looks as large or larger than a 1ct diamond.

Conclusion

A custom engagement ring is a fantastic way to ensure that the ring you wear is the one you love, reflecting your individual style and the unique story of your relationship.

In many cases, designing your engagement ring is affordable and lets you stand out. However, consider designing your own if you want the perfect diamond engagement ring. 

There’s no wrong way to “pop the question”. But it’s (hopefully) a once-in-lifetime moment that you and your future spouse will remember for decades. Here are our favorite creative proposal ideas to help you find a romantic proposal method that’s right for you.

#1. The airport chauffeur

Need to pick her up at the airport, bus station, subway or train station? Stand holding a sign like the limo drivers, except on yours write (next to her name): Will You Marry Me?

#2. Make a video

You don’t have to have any fancy software these days to make a video. It can be a collage of special pictures with music in the background, or actual video footage of special moments. Post it on YouTube. Be creative in your presentation and find the right moment to tell her to watch it!

#3. A treasure hunt

This works better at Easter or for birthdays, etc. since it might seem obvious on any other day. Write down “clues” on a piece of paper and have her find new clues on the trail to find the ring. When she does, make the last piece say something clever. “Finding this treasure qualifies you as wife material!” or whatever fits your personality.

#4. Artwork

You don’t have to be an artist to get a painting! Take a special photo of the two of you and have a Canvas print made. There are hundreds of places online or even department and wholesale stores that have a photo department. After the print comes, wrap it in fancy paper with the ring taped to the back. It will always be a special reminder to her of your proposal every time she sees it.

#5. The good dream

Gently wake her up in the middle of the night. Shine a flashlight on her finger after placing the ring on it. Tell her you have something important to ask that couldn’t wait another day. Celebrate with a glass of champagne, or coffee!

#6. Friend participation

Get at least four friends together; maybe two couples you both like to hang out with. Give them shirts with misspellings of “Will You Marry Me?” One could be WILL, another U; then MARY; and ME (or your own name instead). You could tell her everyone is wearing shirts for a work thing or game night, etc. Then have your friends positioned so that the message is facing her and ask her in front of them. Or have them all mixed up and see if she figures it out, it’s up to you!

#7. Ask your pet to help

If you cohabitate and have a dog or cat, train your pet to bring her a piece of paper with your message on it.

#8. Make a rose trail

Sometimes you can get roses from grocery stores after they go by. Ask the manager if instead of throwing them away some night to save them for you (since you’ll be plucking the petals off anyway). Then make a rose trail for her to follow and once she reaches the end of your trail, she will find a special box.

#9. Serenade her

Do you have a musician friend who plays the guitar or violin? If not, hire someone to serenade her a special song. The place is up to you!

#10. Graffiti

Not encouraging vandalism here, but if you can get permission to have a tastefully made graffiti mural (maybe on a barn or your property), this could be a very cool marriage proposal idea.

#11. Message in a bottle

Next time you’re at the beach, pretend you’ve found a bottle there (or go ahead of time and plant it for her to find). When she picks it up, she’ll find a personal letter from you, explaining in heartfelt detail why you love her. Or a poem will suffice.

#12. Balloons

Gather enough balloons to fill up the ceiling or floor (depends on whether you want helium or not). Tie the ring on the end of one or put it in one of the balloons and ask her to pop them all. When she finds it, now it’s time to do your thing.

#13. Crowd participation

Everyone has seen the marriage proposal on the big screen at the football or baseball game done, but what if you get the crowd involved? It might take some organizing, but if you can give the ushers a card to pass out to one whole section (preferably the one across from your seats) and put the instructions on one side (i.e. – please hold up this sign at 3:00 p.m. to help me with a marriage proposal), it could work. Make sure she is looking across the field at the right time!

#14. Jewelry store

Tell her you’ll take her shopping for a special piece of jewelry. You can either pick the ring out ahead of time or let her pick it out. Ask her right at the jewelry store! The sales associates can take a picture of the two of you to display in their store case, and she’ll be bringing all of her friends there to see it.

Of course, there are lots of good reasons to buy your engagement online from a reputable online jeweler.

Brilliant Earth offers the best of both worlds with showrooms in nine U.S. cities and the ability to schedule a virtual appointment to shop for rings. Sometimes, there’s nothing more romantic than involving her in choosing her perfect engagement ring!

#15. Take your relationship to new heights

Are you outdoor enthusiasts? Take her mountain hiking to a special spot. When you reach the pinnacle, get down on your knee and tell her you’re ready to journey through all the ups and downs of life with her.

#16. Snorkeling

If you live in a Southern State (or this could be done in the summer), take her snorkeling. After she gets used to the goggles, tell her you spotted the most beautiful mermaid you’ve ever seen. Show her the ring underwater and ask her to marry you. Hopefully she can lip read.

#17. Massages for two

Many massages offer a couples session. Certain types of massages (like Swedish, for example) use hot rocks and oil. While she’s relaxed with her eyes closed, have the massage therapist slip the ring on her finger and tell her that the most special healing rock for her heart has been placed upon her finger. The rest is up to you.

#18. Dinner and dessert

So one could argue whether or not this belongs in a list of creative proposal ideas, but it’s an old stand-by that deserves its place.

If you’re more of a traditionalist and want to take her to a fancy restaurant, have the wait staff come to your table with “dessert” and singing, like they sometimes do for birthdays. Except ask them to sing something else, such as “You are my sunshine” or a song you request.

#19. Horseback

Many girls love horses and have fond memories of riding as a child, or at least wished they had a chance to go. Arrange to take her horseback riding locally and stop off somewhere romantic along the ride.

#20. Limo surprise

Arrange to have a limo pick her up at work one random day. Inside, you’re waiting with a brand new dress, a makeup bag, hairspray and sexy shoes. Tell her you’re going to make this a night to remember. Having a romantic moment is easy when there’s a limousine involved! 

#21. Future together

Go to a fortune teller, palm reader or tarot card professional and give them some props. Take her there someday and tell her you’ve always been curious what they have to say. After she’s there, ask the fortune teller to see the future together with the two of you and use this as your chance to propose!

#22. A Carnival Game Proposal 

Another cool way to propose to your loved one for a totally amazing experience is to get someone working a carnival game at any of your local amusement parks to give the ring to your loved one as a carnival prize. What’s better than winning a game, then looking over to see your special somebody down on one knee?

#23. Make a Box of Chocolates 

If you really want to surprise your loved one and show them that your level of commitment cannot be beaten, then hiding that beautiful diamond engagement ring inside her favorite box of chocolates, right inside one of the chocolates, is another cool idea to take advantage of. Chocolate always makes for a good symbol of commitment! 

#24. Use the Jumbotron

A very popular yet old-school way to propose to your loved one with a diamond engagement ring is to propose at a sporting event, something that should be a great proposal method for all of you sports fans out there. Watch your team win the big game and get yourself a new soulmate out of it too! The deep commitment level you show by letting the whole world know how you feel might just sweep her off her feet. 

#25. Using Those Favorite Flowers

Another cool idea is to hide the ring in a huge bouquet of flowers. This way, she will have something that looks nice and smells better, along with a brand-new engagement ring to solidify your commitment to each other. It’s just not a wedding proposal without some beautiful flowers! Some rose flower petals always helps make things more romantic. 

#26. Breakfast in Bed 

If your special somebody is the kind of person who likes hanging out at home, why not make them a great breakfast menu and put the ring somewhere on the breakfast tray? We couldn’t imagine a more romantic way to wake up in the morning! 

Good luck with your proposal!

No matter which creative proposal idea you choose, do your best to make it unique and memorable. But, most of all, make your proposal special. It’s something she’ll talk about fondly for the rest of her life. No pressure!

So, you’ve finally found “the one” and are ready to propose? Congrats! But do you know her ring size? Here, we’ll show you how to find a woman’s ring size. We’ll even include a few tricks to use to find her size on the DL if you want to surprise her.

How ring size is measured

Ring size is based upon the circumference (distance around) the thickest part of your finger in millimeters. This measurement is the converted to standard ring sizes.

For example, if you measure your ring finger and determine it is 54 mm in circumference, this measurement translates to an American ring size of 7 on a scale between 3 and 13.

If you’re in the United Kingdom, your ring size would be an O on a scale of F to Z. If you happen to live in France, your conversion is easier, as the French simply express ring sizes in the nearest quarter of a millimeter.

Ring size conversion chart (millimeters to ring size)

The U.S. ring size scale goes from size 3 (44.1 mm) to size 13 (69.6 mm).

Use the following ring size conversion chart to convert a measurement in millimeters to either U.S. or U.K. ring sizes.

How to measure for ring size at home

You can easily measure for ring size at home with either measuring tape or a piece of string (or dental floss) and a ruler. You can also buy a ring sizing tool like the one’s jewelers use for less than $10.

The best way to find a woman’s ring size is to either ask or to visit an experienced jeweler who will measure her finger for you. Obviously, if you want to surprise her (or save money by buying from a top online jeweler), you’re going to need to find her ring size on your own!

Find ring size with measuring tape

The easiest way to do this is to measure the thickest part of her ring finger with a sewing tape measure like the one pictured below. You can pick up a measuring take for less than $5 on Amazon, at Walmart, or any fabric store.

Most measuring tape has inches on one side and metric measurements (centimeters and millimeters) on the back. Just be sure your tape has millimeters because inches (or even centimeters) will not be precise enough.

Find ring size with string or dental floss

If you do not have measuring tape, you can find her ring size at home using a piece or string or dental floss and either a ruler or a carpenter’s tape measure.

Simply wrap the string or floss around the thickest part of her ring finger and either cut or mark the string. Then measure it with the ruler or tape measure.

Find ring size with a ring sizing tool

Finally, you can also buy a ring sizing tool like the ones jeweler use. They are quite inexpensive, with several options available on Amazon for under $10.

James Allen will also send you a free one as we explain below.

Here’s what they look like:

• 

• 

Use this virtual ring sizer

Top-rated online jeweler James Allen offers this free virtual ring sizer tool to help you find your girlfriend’s engagement ring size. If you want to be precise as possible, they’ll even mail you a free ring sizer tool.

When is the best time to measure for ring size?

If you’ve ever worn a ring before, you know that your fingers can swell throughout the day or even based upon the weather or your diet. Therefore, it’s important to take multiple measurements to get the most accurate ring size.

At the very least, try to measure her ring size both in the morning and in the evening. To be as accurate as possible, aim to get a few measurements over the course of a few days.

You’ll want to use the largest ring size you measure. If your fingers swell up and you’re wearing too small of a ring, it will be difficult and even painful to take off. In extreme cases, you may need to use a ring cutter to cut it off.

How to find a woman’s ring size without her knowing

If you need to find your girlfriend’s ring size secretly, you can try to use the string-and-ruler method while she’s sleeping or measure one of her existing rings.

If you’re feeling sneaky, you can try to wrap a string around her ring finger while she’s sleeping and then measure the string with a ruler.

What if you can’t do this, or she’s a light sleeper? The next best thing to do would be to find an existing ring she owns. (Just make sure it’s something she wears on her ring finger, like a promise ring.) Every finger is a different size!

With an existing ring, it will be easier to measure the diameter (the distance across) rather than the circumference. Measure the diameter inside the ring, not outside it. You can then calculate the circumference with this formula:

Circumference = π x Diameter (π = 3.14159)

How to buy an engagement ring if you don’t know her ring size

If you want to guarantee your proposal stays a surprise, you may have to buy an engagement ring without knowing your soon-to-be fiancée’s ring size. It’s not a big deal! Jewelers resize rings all the time.

Better yet, good ones should offer to do it for free as part of your purchase.

Of course, you’ll want to make an educated guess about her ring size before you buy. Most women have U.S. ring sizes between 5 and 7.

Try to observe the size of her hands relative to other women. Are they smaller, average, or larger? Buy a size 5 if they’re on the smaller side, a size 6 if they’re average, and a size 7 if they’re larger.

You might just get lucky. She’ll likely be able to wear it until you can get it resized if you’re only off a half size or so. The ring may just feel a little loose or tight.

In the worst-case scenario, your fiancée may not be able to wear her ring immediately after you propose.

How much does it cost to resize a ring?

Most jewelers will offer at least one complimentary ring resizing when you buy a ring from them. The fee to resize a ring again — or a ring you purchased elsewhere — varies by jeweler but is usually less than $100.

Even online jewelers will happily resize a ring that you purchased from them for free. Of course, you’ll need to ship it back and forth.

For example, here is Blue Nile’s official resizing policy.

We provide complimentary resizing for Build Your Own Rings™, and Diamond Bands when within the manufacturer’s recommended sizing range, during the first year. Simply contact a Diamond & Jewelry Consultant at 1-800-242-2728 to arrange for your free resize.

Brilliant Earth will send you a free ring sizer but also offers a very useful printable ring size guide that you can use to quickly find a ring size if you don’t want to wait for a sizer to arrive in the mail. Brilliant Earth also offers a free 60-day resize policy, too. (Request a free ring sizer or get the size guide here.)

James Allen also offers free ring resizing within one year of purchase with free shipping within the U.S. and Canada for the first resize. Additional resizes within the first year cost $25 for gold rings and $50 for platinum.

How do jewelers resize rings?

Jewelers resize rings by making a delicate cut at the bottom of the ring and either adding or removing a small amount of metal to the ring.

As a result, resize fees may differ depending on whether you are sizing up (adding metal) or sizing down (removing metal) as well as the material the ring is made of.

Some rings cannot be resized. These include rings made of alternative metals like Tungsten, rings with milgrain or ornate bands, and some silver rings.

Summary

Finding the perfect ring is easier once you know how to find a woman’s ring size. You can do this by measuring her finger with a measuring tape, piece of string and a ruler, or a specialized ring sizing tool that can be purchased for less than $10.

If you need to secretly find your girlfriend’s ring size for an engagement ring, you can try to measure her finger at night. But it might be easier to measure an existing ring if she has one!

Finally, if you simply can’t find out her ring size ahead of time, it’s not difficult to resize a ring. Most jewelers will do this for free after you buy a ring from them. Otherwise, resizing a ring typically costs between $25 and $100.

Should you spend three months’ salary on an engagement ring? Two months? One? These benchmarks for how much engagement ring to buy have been around for decades. But they’re not the right answer to how much you should spend on an engagement ring.

How much engagement ring to buy

When buying an engagement ring, you should spend as much as you want to, but no more than you can afford.

I know, that seems like a lame answer. But it’s true.

I first wrote about the topic of engagement ring budgets nearly 10 years ago on my financial advice website because I wanted to help people avoid going into debt for an engagement ring.

People get married at all ages, but most people are fairly young when they wed. Building a life with your betrothed is going to be expensive — from the wedding to a home to perhaps starting a family. You don’t want to start your new life together by adding on thousands of dollars of debt for an engagement ring.

Sure, we all want to have that fairy-tale proposal that she’ll remember forever, but how many months salary can you really afford to spend? Your marriage proposal should never put you in financial hardship! If you think that your special somebody is going to care about the ring size, then you may want to have an honest conversation with them about your financial situation. 

When determining how much engagement ring to buy, start with what you can afford without going into debt. (You can put it on a credit card as long as you can pay it off in full!)

If you absolutely must pay for your engagement ring over time, try to look for a credit card that offers a 0% introductory APR for a year or more. Pay the ring off before the no-interest promotion expires.

Fortunately, you can build a beautiful diamond engagement ring on any budget. The key is to skip the chain jeweler stores. The bigger and fancier the store, the more you’re going to overpay for your engagement ring.

Reputable online jewelers like Blue Nile, James Allen, and Brilliant Earth offer the best selection of diamond engagement rings at up to 50% off the prices you’d pay in stores.

Other couples are spending less than you think

According to an article in London’s Daily Mail, a survey conducted in England revealed that the average amount spent by men in that country for an engagement ring is still “three.” That’s three weeks, not months.

The survey revealed that just over two-thirds of men responding to the survey spent less than one month’s salary on a ring for their beloveds.

Only 38 percent of the men in the survey said they told their fiancées what the rings cost. Buttressing that figure is the 45 percent of women surveyed who said they know how much their rings cost.

Where did ‘two months’ salary’ come from?

The notion that you need to spend two months’ salary on an engagement ring was invented as a marketing campaign for De Beer’s, the largest diamond cartel in the world. Here’s one of their ads:

Of course a diamond company would want you to spend that much on their product! It’s utterly ridiculous.

The average engagement ring definitely shouldn’t cost you two months of salary. So, what is the average cost of a diamond ring as found at a diamond retailer? According to the experts, the national average cost for an engagement ring is roughly $6,000. Although this may seem quite ridiculous, that’s a pretty standard engagement ring price.

The ad suggests that by overextending on a diamond, a man is somehow demonstrating he will provide a lavish future for his wife. There are a lot of problems with this concept. But financially speaking, I would argue that an average person spending that much on a ring is likely demonstrating they are reckless, not responsible, with money.

De Beer’s didn’t just invent the concept of spending two months’ salary on an engagement ring — they invented the entire concept of giving a diamond as a symbol of engagement.

The Great Depression of the 1930s wrecked havoc on the diamond industry. De Beer’s marketing campaign to get men to spend 1/6 of their annual salaries on diamonds before getting married saved the industry. Not surprisingly, they’ve clung to it ever since. You don’t have to.

How much engagement ring can you afford?

The amount you can afford to spend on an engagement ring should be whatever amount of money you can save over the course of several months without going into debt or avoiding other financial obligations. Wedding rings can be very expensive, especially if you get one with a large center stone, but this doesn’t mean that you should go broke buying a diamond. 

I’m a financial journalist and consumer advocate. Yes, I earn commissions from jewelers on this website. But ultimately those commissions afford me the ability to help readers like you make wise informed decisions. And I do not want you or anybody else spending more than you afford on a diamond. As far as choosing between online retailers, diamond marketers, and you the consumer, I will always be on your side! 

Ideally, you will be thinking of proposing long before you’re ready to get down on one knee. Use that time to put aside some money each month that you will use to buy your ring. The longer you save, the more engagement ring you can buy.

What you do not want to do is walk into a jeweler on the spur-of-the-moment and buy a $20,000 on jewelry store credit.

They might offer a come-on like no interest for 6 months. But unless you can pay off the ring before the 6 months are up, the ongoing interest rates of these kinds of loans are often 20% interest or more. In other words, an absolute rip-off that will be a financial albatross around your neck for years to come.

Buy only as much engagement ring as you can afford!

How can you save money on an engagement ring?

Heirloom or estate rings, non-diamond gemstone rings and lab-created diamond rings are all possible ways to buy an engagement ring for less.

Heirloom or estate rings

A family heirloom ring is probably the most meaningful type of engagement ring you can give your future wife. Even if you don’t have such a ring in your family, you can find absolutely stunning diamond rings at estate jewelers.

Estate jewelry is just a fancy word for used jewelry. And though used goods often come with a negative connotation, I can think of few things better to buy used than diamond jewelry.

Diamonds are the hardest substance on earth. They do not change and cannot get banged up even after decades.

Diamonds are not good investments. They aren’t a store of value that reliably appreciates over time like gold. When new, diamonds are sold at a large markup to their wholesale price.

When you buy a new diamond — even from an online jeweler with excellent prices — you will not be able to resell your diamond for what you paid. You will pay much less of a markup on estate jeweler. In other words, you will get more diamond for less money.

The thing about estate jewelry is that styles change over time. If you or your fiancée have your hearts set on a modern style ring, estate jewelry may not work. Conversely, an elegant design from a bygone era is sure to stand out and will arguably be even more special of a ring.

Alternative gemstones

Sapphire, ruby or emerald engagement rings make a unique and beautiful alternative to diamond rings.

Remember that De Beer’s — the diamond cartel — started the trend of giving diamond rings upon engagement less than 100 years ago.

It’s hard to argue that a ring is a touching symbol of eternal love, but there is no rule that it has to be a diamond.

And although no gemstone sparkles quite like a diamond, the colors of sapphires, rubies and emeralds will stand out on their own.

If you’re curious, try building your own gemstone engagement ring at James Allen.

Lab-created diamonds

Lab-created (or man-made) diamonds are real diamonds that are grown in a lab rather than deep within the earth. Often, you can buy an equivalent lab-created diamond for less than an earth-created diamond.

Lab-grown diamonds are a fascinating thing. Just a few decades ago, scientists discovered how to recreate the natural process of growing diamonds by subjecting carbon to immense pressure and heat in a laboratory.

The result are real diamonds that are so indistinguishable from earth-created diamonds that lab-makers must engrave their name and a serial number on every one.

More: Lab-grown diamonds vs earth-created diamonds: What’s the difference?

There are several advantages to lab-grown diamonds:

• They eliminate any ethical concerns that you are buying a diamond that mined with slave labor or traded in support of violence (so-called blood or conflict diamonds).
• They have superior color qualities (they are clearer and less yellow) than earth-created diamonds.
• They can be less expensive.

It’s worth noting that it’s possible for a lab-grown diamond to cost as much as an equivalent earth-created diamond. But as a rule, they are less expensive.

The bottom line: It’s your ring!

An engagement ring is a deeply personal token of love between you and your betrothed. How much you decide to spend on an engagement ring is as important as the style of ring you choose.

If you believe a ring should involve making a sacrifice to somehow demonstrate commitment, then go ahead and spend two or three months’ salary.

If you can’t (or don’t want to) spend that much money on a ring, that’s more than OK. Most people are spending a few weeks’ worth of income on their rings, not months!

What you also need to realize is that there are other factors that will determine how much you spend on a ring. For one, the type of metal that the setting is made of will make a difference, with some precious metals costing more than others.

You have yellow gold, white gold, sterling silver, and so much more to choose from. Yes, the cost of wedding bands can be quite high, and according to the American wedding study it can cost you around $6,000, which for most people is going to be at least a couple of months of salary, if not more.